Weather.
Hard news.
Cancellations.
Late night talks.
I am not sure what a normal schedule looks like these days. Yesterday, in fact, was particularly unpredictable and thorny causing me to cross a pitiful number of items off of my mile-deep and Eiffel-tower tall checklist. Once again, my desire to achieve finds itself bumping into the reality of the Father's invitation for me to instead receive what He has in store for me.
What a dilemma!
In many ways, my life hasn't been too keen on letting this Lenten season reach a normal, predictable rhythm. A roller coaster ride on many fronts is more like it -- emotionally, physically, spiritually, etc. And like a dazed customer at an amusement park I find myself on this ride never quite ready for the unannounced 90-ft drop that inevitably comes, jolts my heart, and muffles my inner cries.
How I long for calm and peace!
Humbly, I turn to Psalm 139 anew. Eleven full days have come and gone since I began meditating on this psalm -- what a tremendous blessing it has been! -- and on this 12th day I have much comfort as I read up to verse 3:
Psalm 139
To the Choirmaster. A psalm of David.
1 O Lord, You have searched me and known me.
2 You know when I sit down and when I rise up;
You discern my thoughts from afar.
3 You search out my path and my lying down
and are acquainted with all my ways.
I am comforted because Psalm 139 reminds me that this amazing Lord of mine foreknew the pace of these past few days and still saw fit to let me partake in them. He knew about the snow, the bad weather, the hard news, the cancellations, and the late night talks well in advance. He knew everything about me even before the creation of the universe -- my personality, my secret wishes, my innermost thoughts. He knew my desire to achieve feats in my own strength but chose to invite me to receive His feats instead. He knew the nature of my roller coaster life and provided me with His Word which, alone, can shush my storms to a whisper.
Praise His glorious name!
This mysterious Lord observes my path and my cot, my walking and my sleeping. He surrounds me with the shield of His penetrating gaze and encircles all of me (mind, body, spirit) within the boundaries of His perfect wisdom.
Awake?
He sees me.
Asleep?
He searches me.
Straying from His path?
He runs decidedly after me.
Dozing through and forgetting His way?
He slumbers not but remembers me fully.
O, thank You for the shield of Your gaze, O Father. Your boundary lines have fallen for me in pleasant places. May the path I take and the bed in which I sleep bring honor and glory to Your name! In Jesus' name, I pray. Amen!
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