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Ostinato -- a term that signifies a continually repeated rhythmic pattern.

Usually, people discuss the above term in music. Notwithstanding my own musical life, I have learned to recognize "ostinato" in my life in general. The "continually repeated rhythmic pattern" that seems to plague my life on this earth comprises many things, including:

- tears
- trials
- torments
- temptations

Every day, it seems, the stars align to pounce on my mind, body, and spirit with a series of attacks that threaten to undo me. In fact, a friend recently teased me with this question, "Are you applying for Job's position?"

"No, I couldn't possibly fill his shoes," I responded.

Yet, deep inside, I know how easily I plunge into the "Woe is Lou" mindset. Gratefully, divine grace prods my ever-aching heart to accept the tears, trials, torments, and temptations that come my way as daily reminders that I am a sojourner in this world -- I am not yet home.

I long for my true Home.
I yearn for my blessed Hope.
I crave the Heartbeat of Heaven.

Attentive to the stirrings within my breast, Christ's voice comes to me and says, "My beloved, weary and heartbroken though you are, as long as you come to ME with all your heart and soul and mind and strength, you are home right now, in this world and the next, because I have already overcome the world. I AM your HOME."

"Come home, come home,

Ye who are weary, come home

Earnestly, tenderly Jesus is calling

Come home, O sinner, come home."

Extracted from Softly and Tenderly Jesus Is Calling by Will L. Thompson

He is my HOME!

Oh, how I hate to admit that I do not always see it in that light!

Sheer honesty reveals the impossibility of my coming home -- loving Christ with ALL my heart and soul and mind and strength. On my own, I find myself clinging to worries and warts that are too unsightly for the beautiful, holy, and amazing HOME that He is. Hence, He leads me with cords of kindness, with the bands of love, and He becomes to me as one who eases the yoke on my jaw, bending down to me and feeding me His unfathomable grace and favor.

Indeed, it His grace that will lead me HOME.

So, today, I pray for the perspective and strength to surrender my longings, yearnings, and cravings to Christ, the Hound of Heaven. Through His gracious love, may He continually pursue me through the "ostinato" of tears, trials, torments, temptations, and whatever else this world hurls or throws at me!